Keeping Stress Low While Dealing With Frustrating Family During The Holidays
The holidays can be a joyous time. They are filled with family gatherings, together with friends, and of course, let’s not forget the delicious food we get to eat throughout November and December.
It would be amiss not to mention that the holidays can be extremely stressful for many reasons. You have gifts to buy and social “obligations”, not to mention you still have normal everyday life things to contend with. One of the most significant stressors of all is, ironically, family. You may look forward to seeing them and getting quality time in. However, these interactions with your family can sometimes make you agitated (which may be putting it kindly). Thankfully, there are ways to keep the stress low during the holiday season.
Practice Acceptance
Generally speaking, most people are predictable. We rarely hear or see someone do something that makes us pause and think, “That seems very off-brand for them.” By now, you likely know that your aunt will be nosy, your uncle will get loud over politics, or your cousin will talk relentlessly about themselves. Remember this when attending any family gathering, whether it is the holiday season orSometimes, as frustrating as these scenarios are, it’s better to accept that it is just how someone is. While you shouldn’t have to accept disrespect or rudeness, sometimes it’s better to practice accepting someone’s personality and letting it go.
Set Boundaries
Everyone has the right to express themselves or their opinions. However, these opinions should never disrespect another person.
If you feel uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to inform the other person. Respectfully tell them you would like this subject to be dropped or changed. If they still don’t let it go, you can remove yourself from the conversation anytime.
Try Not To Take Everything Personally
This can be easier said than done. Sometimes, what another person says is a direct attack against you. Even in those cases, it isn’t always just about you. Sometimes, others will take their hurt and anger over what is happening in their lives and lash out at people who don’t deserve it.
As hard as it can be, don’t take everything people say personally. Unfortunately, some people are complex and challenging to please, no matter your place.
Accept What You Can’t Control
As challenging as it is, you can’t always change how people think, talk, or behave. However, what you can control is your reactions to it. If you struggle to stay calm with frustrating family members, accepting what you can and can’t control is a great starting point.
Stay Mindful
Sadly, some people find great enjoyment out of knowing they caused someone to become angry or upset. This, more than anything else, can lead to heated arguments and tension. They’ll feel egged on by knowing they frustrated somebody and find it entertaining.
In these moments, stay mindful of how you are feeling. As tempting as it can be to dish something back at them, this often does more harm than good. If you are triggered by something that was said or done, it will likely be best to remove yourself from that situation. You did nothing wrong, but engaging in this behavior can sour any holiday gathering.
If your heart begins racing or you start to feel heated, you can calm your nervous system down by practicing breathing techniques. Breathing techniques like boxed breathing can help you feel calmer and more collected.
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You aren’t alone if you struggle to deal with frustrating family members… year-round. Reach out to us to learn more about family and Anxiety Therapy and how it can help you all year round.