4 Tips For Dealing With Frustrating Family Members During The Holidays

It’s another holiday season. Lights are twinkling outside, the fireplace is lit, and you can practically taste all of the cookies and food you get to eat in just a few short weeks of one another. You get to see family you haven’t in a while and spend quality time with one another.

Idyllic, yes? Well, not always. While the holidays are a joyous occasion for many people, for others, it just isn’t.

The truth is, we can’t help but feel frustrated by family during the holidays. As nice as it would be if we could all say our families don’t annoy us to some degree, that isn’t always the case. Even though they may be frustrating to deal with, there are definitely ways to handle this that are healthy. And, these tips are really useful for any time of the year, regardless of the holiday season!

1. Controlling Other People’s Actions Or Words Is Not Possible

One of the best tips to deal with anyone who is frustrating us is to remember we can’t control them. You can’t control what they choose to say or how they behave. What you can control is your reaction to them.

This doesn’t mean that they are justified in how they act or what they say, keep in mind. What this means is that you cannot control people’s differing viewpoints or actions. Even if they are so wrong it hurts, sometimes it is best to remember that these things are a direct reflection of them. Try as we might, you can’t always reason or impart sound logic to them in a way they will get it.

2. Not Everything Needs A Response

This one is a little more tricky. When your family is in yet another argument over politics at the dinner table, you just want to set them straight. Tell them how wrong they are for believing in a certain political idea or candidate. It can seem so baffling to us, after all, that anyone could support certain ideologies or perspectives.

However, sometimes, as we said, you just can’t reason with people. And you likely know that your uncle and his loud opinions aren’t going to change just because someone tries to set him straight. Learning to just leave things unsaid, as challenging as they can be, can prevent things from escalating further out of control.

3. Gatherings Don’t Last Forever

Even if you have to see them a few times during a short span, remember that overall, you won’t have to be around them much. Thankfully, in some cases, our time with family is limited to a short time span at a time. When you find yourself getting ready to explode because someone is being top-notch annoying, keep in mind that your visit with them isn’t going to last forever.

4. Try To Distance Yourself From Them

Hopefully, you are in a setting where there are at least a few other people at the gathering. You can help yourself to remain sane by engaging with other people at the party. You can even try to redirect the conversation to something else as a way to get off a touchy subject. And if they try to broach a topic with you that you aren’t comfortable with, distance yourself from that too. You always have the right to say, “I’m sorry, but I don’t feel comfortable discussing this right now,” and leave it at that.

Family time can be a wonderful or exasperating experience. If you find that you feel very frustrated during this time of year, don’t be afraid to reach out to us for help with anxiety treatment. Together, we can work to find ways to help you through these challenging situations.